I’m am honored to share Shanna’s story of recovery & redemption through God’s love. She has become a huge part of the community at The Grove and we are beyond thankful for her presence and the hope she brings to our lives.
Recovery & Redemption
by Shanna McClure
When you look up the definition of wonder there are a couple different meanings. It can mean a cause of astonishment or to marvel. However, it can also mean a feeling of doubt or uncertainty. How ironic that the feeling of doubt and uncertainty that plagued a big part of my adult life so far is the very thing that brought me closer to God and all glory and wonder!
About 4 years ago I suffered a loss that shook my faith to the core. After many years of active addiction followed by multiple years of sobriety, a fatal overdose took the life of someone that meant the world to me. I was mad, hurt, lost, overwhelmed, and confused. I had done everything the way I was supposed to. I had thanked God endlessly for his sobriety and praised God for breaking the chains of addiction. So why was I being punished? This is how God takes care of his children? I couldn’t make sense of any of it and I ran. My journey took me on some back-road detours and down a one-way street going the wrong way.
I was consumed with depression and anxiety and I had absolutely no desire to live. I had a friend during this time that would invite me to church. Getting up on my day off to praise the man that ruined my life was the last thing I wanted to do. I ended up going one Sunday simply so she would leave me alone.
That morning the pastor was teaching on not to confuse waiting with spiritual laziness. The word waiting is an action word. A waiter in a restaurant serves people. We need to serve him while waiting on his blessings. WOW! Talk about the flood gates opening.
Advocate for What You’re Passionate About
So I started advocating in the recovery community and getting involved with local programs. I attended meetings and events and learned to love people where they are. A lot of these events are held at local churches or sponsored by local churches. I didn’t realize at the time God was placing an army of people in my life.
Almost a year ago, I was at an event at a local church and I met someone that has forever changed my life. I can never thank God enough for putting this man and his beautiful son in my life. He was once in the prison of addiction and like so many suffered so much loss and pain. By the grace of God, he is a living walking testimony of God’s love and mercy having 33 months free of any mind-altering drugs. He does so much for me every day but most importantly he has strengthened my relationship with God. I have never in my life walked this close and poured so much into my faith.
A year and a half ago I was running away from God but today I run to him! The journey back hasn’t been easy and not always enjoyable. Sometimes, God’s blessings are camouflaged with disappointment and even pain. His way and his time always prove to be perfect though.
I still struggle with my identity and accepting that I am not worthy of His love. I still have bad days, days I don’t want to get out of bed. I still have days that I feel an anxiety attack coming on and no idea why?
However, I have learned to focus on the truth and lean on God during these times. I am able to rely on my faith and give it all to Him. I am not cured by any means, but I’m loved, and I’m saved, and I have HIM inside me and guiding me so these demons can’t keep me down.
The Wonder of What God is Doing
Recently, an online reporter for a local news station asked to write a story about my boyfriend and his recovery. No big deal right? God laughed in our face and said just watch what I can do. The story ended up going viral and being shared by tens of thousands of people. I logged on the internet to see it being posted by The Today show! It was amazing, inspirational, and scary! My face is all over the country now?!?! People from all over the country were reaching out desperate for hope and advice.
Check out the interview HERE.
Plot twist! Satan attacked and had me in shambles. I was paralyzed with fear.
I can’t help anyone. What do I have to offer? Someone better than me should be doing this. What about the backlash? I have made so many mistakes.
This is where that army He was building in my life comes into play. I had so many people praying for me and reminding me that I was not created to help or save any of these people. This was not about me. THIS WAS ALL GOD’S DOING. All I need to do is be obedient to him and share his love and he will save them all! TRUST HIM!
I am proud and excited to share that his past Sunday, right before we were to be baptized in front of our church family, the love of my life asked me to be his wife with Jesus guiding us. Then, my future husband was given the opportunity to baptize me. What an absolute WONDERful way to start our new family! God is so good and so faithful!
If you or someone you know has been affected by addiction, you can find hope through the More Than Addiction Ministry.